Here I am, a new mother, and I need to humbly apologize to all mothers in the world.
Prior to having kids I had the thought “Having kids will be easy, I work with kids, I baby-sit, nanny, ect, mothering won’t be that much different.”
Now, all you mothers out there, now is the section of this post that I devote for you to giggle and laugh at my previous statement!
I am fully aware that I have only been a mother for 3 weeks, but each and every day I am hit right across the head (by a 2 x 4) with how incorrect this statement was. I have worked with kids, yes. I have even been surrounded by super behavioral kids in my employment for more hours of the waking day than now. I have had kids for the weekend, ext. However, in ALL of those situations I either got breaks or GAVE THE KIDS BACK TO THEIR PARENTS.
There is something so different about BEING the parent that the kids are given to. There is something profoundly intense and humbling about being the go-to person for a little human for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, FOREVER. Non-Parents downplay how large the difference is between the sometimes caregiver and the forever caregiver. Non-parents don’t realize the frustration and tiredness that comes at 9pm when you just want your daughter to be asleep but she needs 1 more thing, then 1 more thing. Non-parents don’t realize the WORK it takes to maintain the patience needed to deal with kids ALL day everyday.
When I was a Non-parent, as many other non-parents do and our society in general does, I downplayed the full-time work and difficulties that come with the role of parent. It is HARD work.
However, non-parents also don’t understand the pure and utter joy parents feel. Like today, when Joel, S, and I all drove to my office so they could play in the park while I worked. After I was done I walked to the park and when I was almost there I heard a girl shout “MOM!!!!” and come running over with open arms. There is little better in the world. Or the intense love you feel towards your spouse as you watch them parent your children.
So to mothers and parents everywhere, I am so sorry that I minimized everything that you do day in and day out (and in the middle of the night). Since I have been a mother for 3 weeks I have been more tired, more frustrated, more sad, more happy, more loved, more content, more…… well…… everything. When Joel asks me at the end of the day how my day was, I want to say: great and awful. I am still trying to figure out how that can be.
I have to admit, being a parent has made me change my outlook on a lot of things, work included. I can relate and empathize to the parents in my therapy room. I can test out brain research on my children (spinning and calming, vestibular system)
Tonight is our last night as a family of 3, tomorrow morning we official become a family of 5. S is not ready but we keep telling her that there is enough love to go around. Hoping for a good weekend.
I will leave you with this thought: Kids eat a LOT of food!