The Truth About Preschool

A while ago I posted about a preschool curriculum that I had been using for C and P at home. It is an AWESOME curriculum and what I am going to say has nothing to do with the greatness of the curriculum.
We tried, we really did, but so often life got in the way. There was disclosures of new abuse to be dealt with, unsafe behaviors to problem solve, and other things such as doctors appointments galore. I came to realize after about 8 weeks of doing preschool on and off throughout the week that this wasn’t working for my kids.
Yes, of course they need to learn letters, numbers, and about God, but even more than those things they need to learn that they are safe and loved.They need to know that Joel and I will be there for them every day no matter what. No matter if no one slept last night, if I have a migraine, if Joel has to work, if they are naughty or unsafe. BEFORE my children can even think about focusing on academic work they need to know that they are loved and cared for. That there will always be food, clothes, and a house to live in. That Joel and I will always be there for them, and if we ever need to leave, they will always know where we are going and when we will be back.
So as of right now we are not doing a structured preschool curriculum, we review letters and numbers as they come up in our life in a natural way. We mostly instill love and safety whenever we get the chance., and boy do we get a LOT of chances. Like when P is crying at night time that there will be no food when he wakes up, or when S is attempted to hide incomplete school work, or when C is missing her birth family. Those are the learning opportunities in our home. Those are the times we sit down and chat and figure out what each kids needs.These are the times my mom heart breaks for what my children have gone through and continue to grow through.
So no, my 5 year old might not be able to independently identify each letter and number before she starts kindergarten (a year late as it is) and no my preschooler is not going to be reading by the time he enters kindergarten, but the truth is I couldn’t care less. Those things will all come, my kids are hard workers, smart, and are learning how to work around areas of difficulty in each of their lives. Right now all I want them to learn is that they are safe, loved, and taken care of. This is a bit more challenging as our 3rd grader is in public school, where they have their own idea about what needs to be learned and what kids should be able to do at 9 years old. We are currently fighting with them to get what S needs. To NOT send her to first deal with peer issues because the fact that she asked an adult for help is ENOUGH and a HUGE DEAL! That now is NOT to time to challenge her academically while she is getting adjusted to pretty much every aspect of life.
So there you have it, my goal this school year has absolutely nothing to do with academics, and that might not change for next school year, or even the next. Other, typical families can be worried about those things. It’s not that I want my kids to be behind academically, I just want them no NOT be behind in feelings of safety and security that others kids have had since birth. My kids have had permanency and safety and security for 6 months, not since birth so we just need to do some things differently.


3 thoughts on “The Truth About Preschool

  1. Just wanted to say that I think you’ve made a great decision. Until children believe that they are safe, they can’t concentrate on anything else.
    I really believe that focusing on giving you children this sense of being loved and cared for will pay dividends. Once they trust that you have the basics under control, they will be able to enjoy learning and exploring.
    Safety first! 😉

  2. Your kids will be fine, academics will not suffer because you’ve got your priorities straight. Studies show that any head start a kid gets has disappeared by third grade where they all level out. You can work on letter/ number identification as you drive or walk through a store. Make it a treasure hunt (today we are looking for the letter J – who can find the most?). Colors, shapes, so many things can be taught this way. Let life show you what needs taught next, and make everything else fun. Worksheets can add to this if you have time, but they aren’t everything. Good luck and good choice!

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